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Friday 10 December 2010

Deeply Dippy // Right Said Fred

I'm getting so excited about Christmas. The trees went up last weekend, so I made them some stained glass tree biscuits with the help of Jonny on Wednesday evening.


We're having a party next week, and the theme is red gingham (the only thing I'm allowed to be in control of, according to Jonny!) so I wanted these to fit, so I decided on heart shape, to only be filled with red sweeties, and to be hung with gingham ribbon.


I won't try and pretend that these are revolutionary biscuits, I think I've made them since I was very little, but they are stunning. This morning the tree was the only thing lit up in the house, and the way fairy lights glowed through the biscuit looked magical.


They are a little bit dark for my liking, I put way too much mixed spice in, so they raw dough was sort of brown rather than golden. And some of them caught in the oven, and they don't taste good, as to be expected.


But this was the first time I've managed to find a recipe where the biscuits did not spread in the oven. My top tip will be not to use any kind of baking or grease proof paper for cooking them on - the sweeties will stick.
Hoepfully they'll last a while on the tree. I've held some back in the tin just incase the giant mouse that lives there gets to any.

Sunday 5 December 2010

Earth Song // Michael Jackson





I was asked to do another allotment cake on the back of the Transition Town Cake . It was for the charity Eco Local for a celebration they were having, and was, thankfully, much smaller.

I was very pleased with the turnout of this cake. The icing was the best I've ever done, and it seemed ashame to put on the ribbon, and then all the mini vegetables on top.

But it looked grand in the end, and apparently it went down very well at the party.

Fundamentally Loathsome // Marylin Manson

Last weekend I had a foody trip into London, followed by a Christmas Shop-About with Jonny.

I mooched around Borough Market with some like-minded (mulled wine drinking, pie eating, foody) friends. There was a woman selling un-iced 6 inch square Christmas cakes for £47.00!! It was boozy stodge, and not very nice. Anyway, I bought pies and cheese, then we went for lunch at Black and Blue.The burger I had was lovely, but the puddings were a bit meh. I had an icecream sundae, which I suppose you couldn't really go wrong with. Apparently the chocolate brownie was too floury. But I guess that you can't judge a steak restaraunt on its puddings.
After that we hopped in a cab to Knightsbridge and snagged us a table in the Harvey Nichols Champagne bar, and drank some incredible fizz. Amazing.

Then, a little worse for wear I met Jonny and we went and did our Christmas Liberty Trip. Oxford Street and Regents Street were closed for the turning on of the lights, and there was a really nice atmosphere everywhere. Aww.

I went to try on some shoes which I had spent a week lusting over, and they were heart-breakingly narrow. So I cried and Jonny had to take drastic action to cheer me up, the action was attempting to find a tube station and rush home for Strictly.

In hunting for the tube we stumbled across Cox, Cookies and Cake. I admit, I may not have gone in with an entirely open-mind. I'd read a few scathing reviews of the 'Adult' cake shop, a joint venture between Patrick Cox and Eric Lanlard. Yes, it's in Soho. Yes, it's all black and neon. Yes, the staff wear studded leather aprons. Yes, it's crap.

I couldn't see the cookies on entry, just rows and rows of ghastly cupcakes. I asked and the man serving looked at me like I was crazy and pointed out a whole one, thin row of cookies. He said they were all different, but this was clearly a lie, as he named four types, and there were about 9 in the row.

We bought a double chocolate chip one, and ate it on the bus home. Jonny said we could buy a pack of Tesco ones for £1 and photograph those. No one would be able to tell. And the Tesco ones would be better value for money. The Cox Cookies cost £2.50 each. Crazy.

Now the cupcakes. We opted for a Hazelnut and Chocolate one (torso cake) and a Chocolate and Raspberry one (skull cake). None of the cakes were actually labelled with their flavour, which for me, sums up the fact that this shop is entirely about image.

He put them in a box and thrust them towards us.I had to ask for a bag, and they were put into a clear shopping bag. Now, you'd think that this over-publicised shop would have put some thought into the fact that customers will have to travel with their slutty cakes, and therefore would design a bag, in keeping with their theme, that would allow safe transportation of the rude confection. 




Clearly not. That's what they looked like when we got home.

We shared the cakes with my family for a brunch-time snack. The hazelnut one was dry and the frosting was cream cheese which did not go. At all.
The chocolate and raspberry one was a little more moist, but that's because it had a filling of jam. I do not want a cupcake with jam in. Thank you. I can think of many ways to get raspberry into a chocolate cake without having to fill it with jam.

The toppers for the cake were inedible. The torse was made of white chocolate. It was untempered, so chewy and gritty and foul. The skull was made of dark chocolate, which though texturally ok, was very bitter, so I'm going to be mean and assume it's very cheap.

I won't be going back. It's a gimmick, and a very dissapointing gimmick. I did not feel edgy when buying sexed-up cupcakes. I just felt like I'd been conned. The cupcakes cost £4.00 each. £4.00!!!

Jonny also says that a cake shop should really consider it's clientele when choosing door size. It's outrageously skinny, we had to turn side-on to escape.

Somewhere Over The Rainbow // Israel Kamakawiwo'ole

Back in September was my friends wedding, I've posted about practice cupcakes for them.
I spent a day solidly baking, decorating and packing up an large amount of cupcakes, just over 150 to be precise. By the end of it I could barely stand up, I was exhausted.



I also did a large chocolate cake, with a Star Wars topper, made by my fantastic brother, Ollie - Glass Candle Grenades.



The day of the actual wedding was interesting, Jonny was official photographer so I was pretty much alone. His Mum, Rosemary shipped me and the cakes about, which I am so grateful for, it would have been very hard to do it on the bus!

There was a small issue of a tablecloth, which a swift jog along the river at Kingston solved, and then I got my own little peaceful trip on one of the Turks Pier boats up to Teddington, where I was met with more cakes at the Wharf.

Then back to get ready and off to enjoy the wedding. Everything was so beautiful and perfect and I got fantastically drunk.




Thursday 21 October 2010

Bring Your Daughter To The Slaughter // Iron Maiden

I'm the worst daughter ever. This cake is my Dad's Christmas cake from last year. It took me a year to finish it for him. There is no excuse. I just suck.



It was kept nicely fed and apparently is still in tip top condition and is currently being consumed by him while he's on holiday in Scotland.

I did it with Jonny one evening when all I really wanted to do was sleep, hence why it is so simple, and a little bit rough around the edges. And on a plate, not a cake board.

Wednesday 15 September 2010

Walla Walla // Offspring

My brother - Glass Candle Grenades - has returned from his trip to America. He was full of stories and excitement and a large amount of endearing love for his new friends.

He cunningly managed to time his trip to miss my birthday, my Mum's birthday and my Dad's. Strangely enough, he returned in time for his own. He had been in touch and asked what we'd like him to bring back. Dad asked for duty-free rum and Mum wasn't sure what she wanted.

I asked for 'sweets, not chocolate.' I've tasted all the American chocolate I want to.

I got 1.3 kilos of Haribo Gold Bears.

I'm still ploughing through them, I can only eat a few at a time. The colours are incredible on them, so we had some photo fun, which was also an excuse to hunt through the family crockery.


I don't know if it's just me being a bit weird, or if I'm actually right, but I think they have a much higher gelatine content than British ones. Maybe a blind tasting is in order.

Wednesday 4 August 2010

Hungry Heart // Bruce Springsteen

The Dessert Bar has opened at William Curley!! Well, it opened a little while back but monetary constraints meant we were forced to wait.
Then it was my birthday and it was the only thing I could think of that I actually wanted was a trip for some pudding action.
Turns out it was a complete treat day for me - we started off at the London Transport Museum! They have busses and tube trains and so much information about the transport! Serious swoon.

Libby loved driving the bus.

We arrived at William Curley to a lovely welcome after a little trip on a routemaster! Yay!! It was busy so we went and chilled out in the pretty square over the road. Then when it was time we headed in.


So when you go for the a la carte menu you get three courses of dessert! And it all gets made by a chef right in front of you, so you can see exactly what you're getting, and the work and skill that goes into it.
The first course is pre-dessert. The first was a moelleux-au-chocolat, with chocolate sauce, kinako bean ice cream and crystalised pistachios.
The ice cream is never something I would have picked out for myself, but it was lush. I loved it. I'll definately have it next time I go. The moelleux was beautiful - warm and gooey. It definately whet my appetite.


The next pre-dessert was the Pomme Granita. It consisted of a jelly made with agar agar. The texture was completely different to a gelatine jelly. It was melt-in-the-mouth and moreish. The next layer up was creme fraiche, followed by apple spaghetti and topped with the granita part.
It was so fresh and tangy. Jonny and I loved it and I could have eaten two. Or three.


Then the main part. There is a small back story behind my choice. When I worked in the Richmond store I was confronted every day by a picture in the shop of the Mille-Feuille. It wasn't being sold while I worked there, but a tiny version was included on the petit-four. Which I loved. And it was never enough. I have been longing for a full-sized one for almost two years. When we were asked what we'd like for the main there was no hesitation. I didn't even look at the other choices.
The mille feuille consists of layers of hazelnut and chocolate sponges, chocolate mousse, and a layer of praline biscuit and it came with muscavado ice cream and orange segments and orange sauce. Jonny had a bit more of a puzzle but opted for the Foret Noire.


There are no words for how happy I was with my mille feuille. The Foret Noir had white chocolate mousse, dark chocolate mousse, sponge and a kirsch syrup. It came with griottine cherries in a sauce and crystalised pistachios. He obviously has an unmanly and weak stomach and filled up and started finding his a bit rich. Wimp. His was boozy and incredible looking. It came in a cylinder of chocolate. I can't even fathom how it's made.


Then we had the petit fours. These were adorable mini pistachio macarons sandwiched together with a very dark chocolate ganache, and another adorable mini chocolate and yuzu financier, which is my favourite William Curley cake.


All this was washed down with hot chocolate and then home-made lemonade, which was just what you needed to balance out the sweetness.


I can't wait to go back. I suggested to Jonny that we should make it a weekly habit, but he wasn't so keen. Maybe once a month would be reasonable. It costs £15.00 per person. Which also leaves me a bit lost for words as the amount you get and the quality of the experience is just incredible.

Tuesday 22 June 2010

Red Velvet // OutKast

I've long avoided writing this blog to avoid writing something libellous.
The main fault with libel laws is that at the end of the day the publisher is guilty until proven innocent. Or to put it another way; if i was going to call one of London's most successful bakers "morons who know nothing about cooking"
I would be forced by a court of law to prove that this was irrefutably the truth while, until I had done so, I would be expected to cough up the sum of damages to the "moronic" baker's reputation each time the words get published.

Ladies and gentlemen, In the delightful world of the Internet, every day is a new publication. As such the delightfully nick-named and over paid libel lawyers criticised weekly in Private-eye are able to open a new case and compensation claim every day. The one and great defence against the libel lawyers is the fact that you are telling the truth this makes a claim no longer libellous and simply a fact. I concede that probably a successful baking company does in fact know a bit about cooking and as establishers of a working and growing business are probably not moronic.

In conclusion, your honours, I would like to state that the humming-bird bakers are NOT morons who know nothing about cooking. In fact they are shrewd marketers who are bloody good at scamming their customers. So you get hyperbolic online reviews like these:

"incredible cup cakes Red Velvet is incredible if you fancy one BUY 2!!! Trust me on this…" said BigBruv from Cardiff


"This place never fail [sic] to deliver. It’s the best place to hang out with a mate or two on a saturday afternoon, having a slice of cake.
My favorite is the Red Velvet cake. They are delicious!"
comments beequin from London


"I have heard that the likes of Gwyneth Paltrow and Ewan McGregor come to buy cake here and I wouldn't be surprised!
They sell the most amazing cakes and cupcakes. The best are the red velvet cupcakes. This also comes in a full sized cake.
It is a sponge which is red, iced with the most delicious cream cheese icing I have ever tasted."

That's right dw27 from London it is a cake that is red.

Hold on.. what do you say? a cake that is red! ... you mean... NO! you don't say? someone has put red food colouring in a cake.
HOLD THE PHONE GUYS. Call the Times and hold the front page on the Wall Street Journal and while Murdoch's on the blower we'll get this in the Australian Sun.

Someone SOMEWHERE Has had the tenacity to put food colouring into some food!


I first encountered this scam about a year ago. Libby had reason to make some cupcakes to impress and she had heard of these great "Red Velvet" cupcakes.
Everyone said they were the best, "there must be some baking trick" she said. Some kind of secret ingredient..
I countered that this was silly and in fact they can't be that good chocolate cupcakes would be nicer. "But" our lovely lib said, "but everyone on the Internet says they're the best".."they cant just be ordinary cakes"

I gave in, there must be some trick I thought. Because, sometimes reluctantly, I usually trust Libby when it comes to cake.
She scoured one recipe book then purchased a new cupcake recipe book.
It didn't have a red-velvet recipe. She then forked out a bit more for the Humming-Bird Bakery recipe book. This book told her the secret. The trick. The hidden ingredient. The baker's special flick of the wrist that makes red velvet the top cupcake of the day.
It told her to make a cake and to put in to the mix some red food colouring.

I don't know why it's so disappointing but I just feel cheated. We eventually wound up in Portabello and got a black bottomed cupcake and a red-velvet. It was so red! It was like a cupcake had been slaughtered and bled onto another cupcake then covered
with frosting. Aesthetics aside the cupcake was under filled and over topped but that's ok as the cake (once you've had a swig of whisky to help you overcome the shock of it's cakey redness) is pretty dull and wouldn't hold up to close scrutiny if presented on its own. Cupcakes dry out quickly so it was our fault for carrying the cake all the way home from Portobello before tucking in; It was dry, but there should have been some flavour.
The icing is nice but if I want a cheesecake I'll buy a cheesecake thankyouverymuch.


As you may have gathered I have a general contempt of excessive food colouring. It's not big and it's not clever. Colouring foods unnecessarily was in its last throes when Fanny Craddock dyed hard boiled eggs blue in the 70's in an attempt to reinvigorate her image. Are you surprised that it was a total flop?

If you're still taken in by the red-velvet phenomenon, come to my house and I'll cook you a purple roast chicken and I hope you choke.

Sunday 20 June 2010

Smaller and Smaller // Faith No More

A little bit of news to start - Jonny has graduated! I think. I don't really know what process he has to go through to make him graduated (yay grammer) but I know that he's finished uni and his mark has been confirmed and he had his exhibition. Which was great fun, and I was very drunk.

Anyway to celebrate his Mum hosted a little do. She asked me and my Mum to do the sweets.


This was an exciting offer as I'd just bought a new book from Books for Cooks. If you are ever in the Portabello Road area I would say you should do to Books for Cooks more than you should go to the Hummingbird Bakery.

Anyway my new book is called Petit Fours and is just beautiful. I bought it for inspiration for not only food photography and styling, but interior inspiration too (that there is my guilty little indulgence that doesn't involve The Doctor).

The recipes in this book are brilliant. Definately aimed at the dinner party hosting crowd. The recipes are for bacthes of around 8-10. We made the lime meringue pies and the raspberry mousse brownies.


And I did some cute piping, which I was quite pleased with. The lime meringue pies were lovely and I plan to make lots more. The raspberry brownies were a bit trickier. As ever I couldn't tell when the brownie was done, so it was much dryer than it should have been. Mum made the mousse, and it was weird. Weird. Sort of grainy. I should read the recipe, that would probably explain why.


They all went down very well, and everyone said how nice they were. The main point of this post will be LOOK AT THE PIPING!!

Monday 14 June 2010

Overnight Sensation // Raspberries

My brother - Glass Candle Grenades - is leaving to work in America. Anyone would think he's off forever the way my Mother is acting. He's having a last supper of roast beef followed by trifle. It seems the trifle is down to me. He's only off for about four to five months, I think, to work at Camp America.


I hate trifle. Cream is never really something I can get excited about. Nor is custard. If there is pie on offer, I'd much prefer to have pie with nothing else. My Father will put cream and custard on everything, and Oliver will just take the custard. All of it. Straight out of the tub.
But for me the combination of cream and custard and jelly and sponge is just ick. No. Why do it?


So I wasn't very excited about this dessert until Jonny gave me the challenge of not using a recipe. So I have planned a raspberry and almond trifle. And because the recipe is mine: I can post it. I will also defend my use of shop bought custard as it's Oliver's absolute favourite, and any custard I make would never be good enough.
 It's made up of five elements and takes two days to make so if you're about to embark on "libby's awesome raspberry and almond trifle" make sure you give yourself time to plan...


Libby's Awesome Raspberry and Almond Trifle

Genoise Sponge
115g caster sugar
4 eggs
60g plain flour
55g ground almonds
55g butter – melted and cold

Heat the oven to gas mark five and prepare an eight inch tin.
Combine sugar and eggs – put on a bain-marie until the egg mixture reaches roughly 40 degrees. Take off the bain-marie and whisk until cold and ribboning. The mix should look creamier than when you started, and should be thick enough to leave a pattern when you drizzle some back into the mix; you should be able to complete a figure of eight before it starts to sink back in. It will take about 10 minutes by hand and a little less with an electric whisk.
Fold in the flour and ground almonds and then add the melted butter.
Put in the tin and bake for 20-25 minutes.

Amaretto Syrup

50g Water
50g Sugar
25g Amaretto

Boil the sugar and water for 30 seconds. Put in a metal bowl to cool.
Allow to cool completely and then add the Amaretto.
Keep in a sealed container

Raspberry Jelly

250g Raspberry pureé (I used frozen raspberries blended with a bit of water)
250 Stock Syrup (half sugar, half water)
12.5 g gelatine
A few whole raspberries

Soak gelatine in cold water until nice and floppy. Remove from the water and set aside.Boil up the syrup, then add to raspberry pureé, then whisk in the gelatine until it is fully dissolved. Add some whole raspberries if desired.

1 tub of shop bought fresh custard
A couple of tubs of Whipping Cream
Flaked Almonds for decoration
Fresh raspberries for decoration


Assembly:

Day 1
Make Amaretto syrup. Bake genoise sponge. Remove from tin and soak with Amaretto syrup. When cool slice up and layer in the bottom of trifle bowl. You may have some left over.
Make the jelly and pour over the sponge pieces. Leave outside for a while until nearly cool, then cover and move to fridge to set overnight.

Day 2
In the morning pour the custard over the jelly – leave uncovered in fridge.
When it's time to serve, whip up the cream until just stiff and heap on top of the custard. Sprinkle with flaked almonds and fresh raspberries. Serve immediately.

Sunday 13 June 2010

Brown Eyed Girl // Van Morrison

Jonny and I went to Portabello Road yesterday. I wanted a suitcase and a tea cup, Jonny wanted a flannel shirt. You tell me. Anyway. We both failed in our objectives. You'd be hard pushed to find a suitcase under two hundred pounds, and all the crockery was manky.
Jonny's ideal flannel shirt he'd already seen on a friend, so seeing as it had already been sold I think finding it for sale would be a challenge.

As soon as we got off the tube at Notting Hill Gate it was manic. Oh the crowds. And we were early! We walked from Notting Hill to Westbourne Park and it took forever. It was nicely broken up with stall browsing and a mandatory visit to the Hummingbird Bakery. They were queueing out the door when we arrived, but I was determined.

The service was remarkably brilliant, fast and polite. Though the people behind me obviously had no concept of personal space and kept crowding. Chill out people! There is enough cake for everyone! You will get your turn.

At first I ordered a slab of frosted brownie, a black bottomed cupcake and a carrot cupcake. But then a fresh tray of Red Velvet appeared so I changed my mind on the carrot. Jonny has requested to review the Red Velvet, so I'll leave that to him.


We sat outside on the curb to eat the brownie. God it was good. So close to the brownie perfection we seem to be on a never-ending mission for.
Jonny said 'The most important thing about a brownie that has been cooked wll is it makes you wonder ''has this been cooked?' '' which I suppose sums up his tastes. For me it's winning for it's use of whole hazelnuts and crisp top and gooey middle.

I'd bought a black bottomed cupcake to see what cake/cheesecake ratio it had, as I'm never sure if I've put too much or too little on when I bake them. I don't know if it was just this individual cupcake, but it was greatly lacking in cheesecake. The cream cheese frosting made up for it a little, but the cake was dry. And when I bake them I don't frost them, so this seemed really over-sweet.


I think I am arrogant enough to say that I much prefer the ones I make to the one I bought. Wow. I bake a Hummingbird cupcake better than they can.

All in all I feel like it was a little bit of a wasted trip. I had a great time mooching with Jonny. It was perfect in that respect. But I do wish we'd headed to Pimlico to try out the newly opened dessert bar at William Curley.
Soon though. Soon.

Wednesday 2 June 2010

China in Your Hand // T'Pau

I can't remember if I said before, but I've been asked to do some cakes for a friends wedding. Jonny has been asked to do the photography too. I always said that I wanted to steer well clear of weddings and angry brides. But this is entirely different. I can't imagine them stressing out too much about their wedding.

At some point in last week we took six flavours of cakes for them to taste. They said that they looked how they imagine they should, and the sprinkles went down well. Much to my happiness. Jonny had earlier disagreed on the sprinkle front.


We gave them 6 flavours. Chocolate, lemon, vanilla, sea salt caramel, carrot and orange and coffee. The flavours they chose (and probably the ones I would too) were chocolate and lemon, and another to be confirmed, which will either be carrot or vanilla. They're having a meal with 3 courses (including dessert) so the cakes can't be too sickly or heavy.

It was really nerve-wracking putting my cakes up for judgement like that, but they were very polite, and I think that if they hated them they wouldn't want them at the wedding and they'd tell me. I hope. They''ve asked for 150 anyway, so I best get planning.

I have a couple of obsessions, the first being obviously sugar and everything to do with it. The second is stationary. I can spend hours in paperchase touching notebooks and paper. I'm a bit weird. But these two obsession happily collided when Paperchase introduced a whole cakey range!! I bought as much as I could, including a completely useless minature tea set. And then I had to buy a new cake tin from lakeland so I could bake mini things to go on it. The results follow.



Sunday 30 May 2010

Brighton Rock // Queen

I have quite a lot to catch up on! Expect a few blogs over the next few days..

On Sunday we headed down to Brighton to celebrate Mister Chay's birthday. We picnicked on the beach.. well as we'd already been away mine and Jonny's picnic consisted of burgers and chips from Grubbs. I highly reccomend it if you're in need of a filth fix. It's a must-do for any trip to Brighton.


The other must-do for any beach trip is ice creams! Suprisingly, it was only me and Becci that fancied one. You know the kind I'm talking about. Not real ice cream. That miscellaneous stuff that unfurls out of a machine.


I had two flakes. I realise now this is quite greedy. Becci wanted butterscotch sauce but the man had only strawberry or chocolate. She was very dissapointed, and while she struggled on with eating the sauceless ice cream you could see how distressed she was.








After mooching and doing poi and going in the freezing-icicles-of-death sea we all packed up and headed for the pier. We went on the little rollercoaster.


And then we went on the Waltzer. I love a good waltzer. Especially after beer and ice cream.

Then to the pub for some horrendously bad food and service (I was behaved and didn't complain or moan, as Jonny pinched me). I was by now tired. The plan was to head on to a club event reggae thing. Which isn't my cup of tea, but I fully intended to go in order to not look like a grumpy mare that won't do anything that involves something she doesn't like.. but we were tired so four of us headed for the train.


We picked up crepes on the way. While they were impressively cooked and looked really really nice, the batter was odd tasting and chewy. All the nice stuff dripped to the bottom of the cone that they'd been plonked in. That was dissapointing. I think next time I'll just get a second icecream.


Wow. Reading that you wouldn't think that I had a massively awesome day. It was so much fun. Especially the rollercoasters.

Friday 28 May 2010

Letter From America // The Proclaimers

Libby made a carrot cake for her work. It had cream cheese icing which is delicious but once the icing was on we decided it needed something else to make it look more exciting. We didn't have any sugar paste icing to make an orange carrot so I made a stencil and we sieved cinnamon through it to make it quite plainly a carrot cake.


I was quite chuffed with my stenciling.

There's been a very detailed carrot cake in the past and this was made using the same recipe from the Hummingbird Bakery book.